Giving a Toast at a Wedding for the Men of the Wedding
There are three key men of the wedding; groom, best man, and father of the bride. All three must at give at least one toast during the reception. Be ready when called upon. A toast or a speech is comprised of three basic elements: The words said, how you say them, and your body language. When listeners rated what is most important, seven percent rated that the words of the speech most important. Thirty eight percent thought how you say them was most important, while fifty-five percent thought it was your body language. This means that if you say, We welcome Tom into the family, but your body and voice intonations say otherwise, the audience will know you really don't like Tom.
Eye contact is critical to getting listeners to trust you. Make it a practice to look individual audience members in the eye. Hold their gaze for 5 to 10 seconds, then move on to another person. If that's difficult for you, then look at the center of their forehead or just above their head instead of their eyes. Practice looking in a mirror and practice your speech standing up, just like you will at the wedding.
Watch what you do with your hands. If you fold your arms across your chest, you can look like you're protecting yourself or holding back information. If you put your hands in your pockets, you can look embarrassed. Practice speaking with your hands at your side, making gestures when it's appropriate.
Be sure you can be heard. Use a microphone if necessary. Vary the tone of your voice"put some excitement in it. Speaking in a monotone can sound insincere. Ben Stein is famous for delivering speeches in a monotone voice, but it doesn't work well at weddings.
Avoid making fun of the couple. Saying something that only the couple and one or two other people will understand will confuse everyone else and the audience might read more into what you're saying than they should. No matter how quickly you believe the happy couple will be heading into divorce court, keep you comments to yourself.
Heavy drinking before a speech is dumb. Most everyone is not as clever while drunk as they think they are. Alcohol tends to get people either feisty or maudlin. Both are bad. You may not believe the marriage will last, but keep negative opinions to yourself.
While your guests feel obliged to listen to you and may even draw pleasure from what you say, remember that they are all busy people sitting on empty stomachs. Just because you have the privilege of holding the microphone, don't hog the limelight. Keep your speech short and sweet, however much you love your moment of glory. Time your speech. A short speech of 600-700 words will take you around 4 - 6 minutes " that is not allowing for pauses, laughter or applause. You may be tempted to add more. Curb it. The thumb rule is half as long is twice as good.
It doesn't matter whether you are the groom, best man, or father of the bride; the wedding and reception are about celebrating the union of the couple. Your speech or toast is an important part of that event. Its a chance to honor your friends and family.
Eye contact is critical to getting listeners to trust you. Make it a practice to look individual audience members in the eye. Hold their gaze for 5 to 10 seconds, then move on to another person. If that's difficult for you, then look at the center of their forehead or just above their head instead of their eyes. Practice looking in a mirror and practice your speech standing up, just like you will at the wedding.
Watch what you do with your hands. If you fold your arms across your chest, you can look like you're protecting yourself or holding back information. If you put your hands in your pockets, you can look embarrassed. Practice speaking with your hands at your side, making gestures when it's appropriate.
Be sure you can be heard. Use a microphone if necessary. Vary the tone of your voice"put some excitement in it. Speaking in a monotone can sound insincere. Ben Stein is famous for delivering speeches in a monotone voice, but it doesn't work well at weddings.
Avoid making fun of the couple. Saying something that only the couple and one or two other people will understand will confuse everyone else and the audience might read more into what you're saying than they should. No matter how quickly you believe the happy couple will be heading into divorce court, keep you comments to yourself.
Heavy drinking before a speech is dumb. Most everyone is not as clever while drunk as they think they are. Alcohol tends to get people either feisty or maudlin. Both are bad. You may not believe the marriage will last, but keep negative opinions to yourself.
While your guests feel obliged to listen to you and may even draw pleasure from what you say, remember that they are all busy people sitting on empty stomachs. Just because you have the privilege of holding the microphone, don't hog the limelight. Keep your speech short and sweet, however much you love your moment of glory. Time your speech. A short speech of 600-700 words will take you around 4 - 6 minutes " that is not allowing for pauses, laughter or applause. You may be tempted to add more. Curb it. The thumb rule is half as long is twice as good.
It doesn't matter whether you are the groom, best man, or father of the bride; the wedding and reception are about celebrating the union of the couple. Your speech or toast is an important part of that event. Its a chance to honor your friends and family.
About the Author:
Ken York is the author of Men of the Wedding - The Final Week. This book is a light read packed with information that the groom, best man, and father of the bride must know before the wedding. His blog amused thousands of readers with the challenges he went through with his daughter's destination wedding in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.